Sugar Relationships: Being “Kept” in the Modern World Without Involving Work
There’s nothing new about relationships between rich men and kept women. These relationships are easier now (lengthy New York Times article) thanks to the Internet, particularly the Web site SeekingArrangement.com. It’s no eHarmony or Match.com. It’s a world of older ”sugar daddies” and younger “sugar babies.”
The women are looking for a monthly allowance (usually $1,000 to $2,000, up to $10,000), to help with expenses, often college tuition. The men are looking for companionship — and sex. The fact that companionship (or something) in addition to sex is part of the deal prevents these sugar relationships from being prostitution.
On Seeking Arrangement, sugar babies outnumber daddies 10 to 1, prompting one daddy to call the Web site “the best fishing hole I ever fished in.” About half the daddies are married. Almost none of the babies are. Despite both parties’ intent to have a non-complicated relationship, emotions occasionally flare. Falling in love can happen. Wives learn what’s going on.
So what’s the connection with work or employment law? Hopefully, from an employer’s perspective, nothing. But consider your married CEO as sugar daddy, using his company computer to access SeekingArrangement.com. The sugar baby isn’t an employee. No problem?
Does the CEO’s conduct violate your Internet use policy? Would you allow a middle manager the same leeway? If the CEO shares his babies with other executives, does the employer have liability if something untoward happens to the sugar relationships? If the daddy’s spouse learns that her CEO husband is using his corner office as headquarters for arranging rendezvous with his baby, does the company have liability to the spouse for wrecking the marriage and causing emotional distress?
Legal advice, anyone? ”Kept” women must be kept completely separate from the workplace — much easier said than done, as The Man Gene will attest.
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About Chris Parker
Chris Parker's practice focuses on the representation and counseling of companies in matters pertaining to the workplace and the protection of their intellectual property and trade secrets. In addition to serving as an advocate for clients, Mr. Parker is also trained as a mediator and frequently serves as a third-party neutral.
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While serving in an Of Counsel relationship with the firm, Mr. Bridgesmith also serves as the Executive Director at the Institute for Conflict Resolution at Lipscomb University and as an officer and principal in Strategic Resolutions Group, LLC. In these roles, Mr. Bridgesmith brings over 30 years of legal experience in dispute resolution and innovative workplace strategies to clients, students and business entities alike.
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You know, don’t most ceo contracts provide that the ceo will not do something that casts the company in a poor light or that is a crime? I disagree with your legal analysis—this is illegal prostitution. The mere fact that you get companionship before the sex and after does not make it any less a crime. Do a “but for” analysis: if there were no sex involved, would there still be a “mentor-mentee” relationship? To ask it is to answer it. Stay Well, Mike
Good to hear from you, Mike.
I don’t know if most CEO contracts have this kind of provision, but certainly some of them do. I think it’s increasingly a good idea to have such a provision.
You’re the Texas lawyer, but the way I read Texas’ statute on prostitution, it would not cover the activity contemplated by the website in question. The payment charged or paid must be for sex — period. The relationships intended to be fostered by this website are, as I read the New York Times article, much more involved than that.
Getting back to the CEO. Let’s say he seeks sex in the more traditional way by soliciting a relationsip with his assistant or some other woman in the company he has the hots for. There’s no question that sex is what’s driving the relationship, at least initially. He buys her gifts. He pays her tuition for the night classes she’s taking at a local college. I don’t think that’s prostitution under the law.
You and I can always be pleasantly disagreeable.
Thanks for weighing in.
John
John,
Walks like a duck, quacks like a duck etc. Best, Mike
No matter what you do in life – you are a whore to something. Use your head. You can whore out your time and energy to huge corporations (men in monkey suits) so that they can live the high life, or you can develop a connection with someone and gain a tool to make your life more feasible to be able to succeed…it is NOT prostitution any more than any of our middle class working citizens are. It is just being wiser. Curious..why is prostitution so bad anyway? Oldest profession in the world? Making someone feel good…hmmm…punishable by law. Anyhow I could go on for hours but it is not worth at as most SHEEPLE will just look at the chains society shackled them with(birth certificates, social systems, money, government, ‘entertainment’, health, etc) and nod b/c it is the ‘norm’ and what most people believe and accept as their own morals, thoughts and judgments.